Therapy Helps
by NJ Furio Fan
Summary: Luka FINDS a therapist


Therapy Helps  
  
  
Luka woke up and looked at the clock, it showed a time of 4:30 am, he didn't have to be up for three hours. He could feel himself getting frustrated, and knew that he would lie there and watch the clock for at least a few hours. This was becoming a regular event. He also knew that it was effecting him at the hospital, he needed to get more sleep. He needed to talk to someone about the nightmares and the sleepless nights. It seemed like every time he thought of getting help, he felt like he was admitting defeat.   
  
Later that morning as he walked into the ER, he saw Kerry. She looked at his face and could tell that he had just spent another sleepless night. She walked up to him as he signed into work and said, "We need to talk." She ushered him into the lounge and sat down on the couch.  
  
Kerry, "Luka, I am very concerned about you. As your friend I think I need to tell you that you need to get some help. You can't keep coming to work this tired."  
  
Luka, "I know Kerry, it's just so hard to talk about everything. Do you think Kim would see me?"  
  
Kerry, "I will ask her today."   
  
Kerry calls Kim asks her to have lunch because she wants to discuss a friend. Kim agrees and makes plans to meet Kerry at 12:30 at Magoos.  
  
At 12:30 Kim walks into Magoos and sees Kerry already seated. They order lunch and then Kerry brings up the subject of Luka.  
  
Kerry, "Kim, Luka has been really having a hard time lately and I suggest he see a therapist, he asked if maybe you would see him. I told him I would ask you and see how you felt about working with him. Would you make some time to see him?"  
  
Kim, "Kerry, I don't know if that is such a good idea, he is our friend, we know each other socially, I don't like to mix the two. I do have a suggestion though; I have a new Doctor starting tomorrow. Maybe I can set something up. Luka should be comfortable with it though. I will talk to him when we get back and if he agrees I will set him up with a few sessions. Do you think it has to do with the mugging last year?"   
  
They finish their lunches and Kim goes into the ER looking for Luka.  
  
Kim, "Luka, can I have a word?"  
  
Luka, "Sure Kim, I know Kerry spoke to you."  
  
Kim, "Yes she did, I have to be honest with you Luka, you are a good friend to both Kerry and I, you are one of the only people here at County who hasn't been judgmental, or acted strange toward us since the our relationship has become public knowledge. With that said, I have to say that I wouldn't feel comfortable treating you. I do however have a new Doctor coming from California starting tomorrow, I think she would handle your case completely professionally and would help you greatly. Would you let me set up some sessions for you?"  
  
Luka, "Kim, I can't go on the way I have been, I need to do something. Sure set it up and let me know when. Bye the way, what is her name?"  
  
Kim, "Christine Cofer"  
  
Luka, "Thanks Kim."  
  
Kim, "No problem Luka, and thanks for understanding."  
  
Kim brings Dr. Cofer downstairs to the ER to meet the staff the next morning. Luka notes that he likes her look and that she seems quite nice. He asks her if Kim has spoken to her about him and she replies, "Yes and I would love to help." They set up three (one hour) meetings for the following week Chrissie is bubbly, bright eyed, 30ish, with long straight dark hair and a warm smile.  
  
Luka seem to sleep better just knowing that he was going to address his problems. The following week he heads upstairs for his first meeting with Chrissie.   
  
Luka, "I know that you probably already know some things, where do you think we should start."  
  
Chrissie, "Well, I understand that you are having trouble sleeping and are having nightmares. Can you tell me about the nightmares first?"  
  
Luka, "I have two different nightmares almost every night. The first is always the same, it is in Croatia and I am trying to keep my wife and daughter alive, but I can't keep doing CPR and I collapse. I can see their faces, and I all I can do is watch them die over and over."  
  
Chrissie, "Have you ever talked to anyone about this event?"   
  
Luka, "Yes, Bishop Stewart last year, It made me feel better for a while, but then the nightmares started coming back."  
  
Chrissie, "I know that losing your family has caused you great pain. I think the biggest part of your pain is the feeling of helplessness. You were there but couldn't stop it, you feel that you were supposed to protect them, but you couldn't, right?"  
  
Luka, "Right"  
  
Chrissie, "I think you have to think about the lives you have saved over the years, I know that two of the ones you lost were the two most important ones in your life, but you can't bring them back, you can't change those events. You need to find comfort in the fact that you make your living and your life saving lives."  
  
Luka, "Three"  
  
Chrissie, "Excuse me?"  
  
Luka, "I lost the three most important people in my life in one day. My son Marko was already dead when I got back to the apartment."  
  
Chrissie, "Oh Luka, I am so sorry."  
  
Luka, "I understand what you are saying and for a long time I did try to do that, the nightmares were very bad for the first two years and then they started to ease a bit. Last year I killed a mugger and that started them again."  
  
Chrissie, "Was it self defense?"   
  
Luka, "Yes, that was what the police said, but I should have stopped hitting him and I couldn't, I just kept pounding his head against the pavement until Abby pulled me off."  
  
Chrissie, "Abby? Who is Abby to you?"  
  
Luka, "Abby Lockhart, she is a nurse downstairs. We dated for over a year, but she and I have decided that it wasn't working and broke up a few weeks ago. She is dating Carter now."  
  
Chrissie, "Does that upset you? Were you in love with her?"  
  
Luka, "No, but I like her. She is the kind of person who makes me smile, I don't know why. It may be her sense of humor. We are still friends. I wanted to help her, but she wasn't ready for me to do that, so we decided to be friends."  
  
Chrissie, "Ok, so Abby isn't the issue, right?"  
  
Luka, "Right, I think the issue, as you put it is that I killed another person."  
  
Chrissie, "Another?"  
  
Luka, "Yes, I killed my family and the mugger."  
  
Chrissie, "Luka, you didn't kill your family, a bomb did that."  
Luka, "No it was my fault, I wanted to stay in Vukovar, to finish my residency. We could have gone to my father's farm and been safe, but I had to finish my residency. You see Dr. Cofer, it was my fault."  
  
Chrissie, "You think you would have been safe at your father's farm, but you don't know that, even if the fighting wasn't taking place there, something else could have happened. Luka, your guilt is overwhelming you. I am going to prescribe some very light sedatives for at night, just for this week. After this week I hope that our sessions will help enough for the nightmares to subside and you can stop the medication. Luka, you didn't make these things happen, they happened and you can't change that, but you didn't make them happen, it wasn't your fault."  
  
Later that day Kim met with Chrissie to discuss Luka a bit. Chrissie told Kim, that she had trouble keeping from crying as she spoke to Luka. She said she didn't know how she was going to get through his sessions without crying. She said she cried after he left. She said she knew that she had to be strong and not show emotion, but he was hurting so bad. She felt like she just wanted to hug him and tell him everything was going to be all right. Kim said she understood, but that Chrissie had to get past it and figure out what was best for the patient. Then Kim asked Chrissie if she thought Luka was handsome. Chrissie turned red and said, "How could you not, he is the handsomest man I have ever seen. I know you are gay, but Kim admit it he is really handsome. I know that's a problem."   
  
Kim, "Yes, even as a gay woman, I can see he is handsome. It shouldn't be a problem unless you let it be a problem. But I would warn you not to get personally involved with him unless you are done with therapy."  
  
Chrissie, "Oh yeah, like he would be interested in me. Come on Kim, look at the man, he could have any woman he wants."  
  
Kim, "Chrissie, do we need to have a session? What's with the negativity about yourself? You are a beautiful, wonderful, very smart woman. He or any other man would be lucky to have you."  
  
Chrissie, "I guess, thanks, but look at him would you?"  
  
Kim, "End of discussion, I am not going to discuss Luka's looks with you again."  
  
Three months later  
  
Chrissie and Luka started sessions three times a week, now they are down to once a week. Luka hasn't had a nightmare in over a month. During their sessions they have finally gotten past the tragedy in Luka's life and have been discussing the future.  
  
During a session Chrissie says to Luka, "I think you are ready to discontinue our sessions on a regular basis, I think we are now at a place where you can call me if you are feeling a need. I don't like to do "Casual" sessions, but in your case I will make an exception. How do you feel about letting go Luka?"  
  
Luka, "I think you are right, but I don't know what I am going to do without our talks. I know that last few sessions have had nothing to do with my "Issues. We have talked about many other things. And I understand that its time to let go, but I like talking to you."  
  
Chrissie, " Just because we aren't having sessions anymore, doesn't mean we can't talk."   
  
Luka, "Would you have lunch with me or dinner with me once in a while, just to talk? Not about my "Problems" but just to talk about life."  
  
Chrissie, "Are you going to the Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome Groups?"  
  
Luka, "Yeah, but I don't talk to much at group sessions, I feel a little uncomfortable yet."   
  
Chrissie, "That will come, don't worry. If you are still going to group sessions then I think we can stop being therapist/patient and start being friends/colleagues."  
  
Luka, "I would like that."  
  
Chrissie, "Me too, but I have to warn you, if I see anything happening with you that concerns me I am going to let you know, OK?"  
  
Luka, "I would hope that you would. What about dinner or lunch sometime, do you feel that would be crossing the line, so to speak?"  
  
Chrissie, "No, not if we have stopped our professional relationship. I would like that."  
  
Luka, "Ok, good. How about tomorrow night, I have two tickets to a concert at the Opera House, I was going to go alone, but I would love some company. What do you think?"  
  
Chrissie, "Are you sure?"  
  
Luka, "I wouldn't ask you if I wasn't."  
  
Chrissie, "That sounds great. I will bring a change of clothes to work and meet you downstairs at 6:00."  
  
Luka, "I look forward to it."  
  
They had a terrific time together that night, but Luka could tell that Chrissie wasn't comfortable with dating him. So he decided to talk to her at lunch the next day.  
  
Luka walked into the cafeteria just as Chrissie was sitting down. He walked over to the counter, got a cup of coffee and some fruit, paid for it and walked over to her table.  
  
Luka, "May I sit?"  
  
Chrissie, "Sure"  
  
Luka, "I'm glad I ran into you, I wanted to talk about last night."  
  
Chrissie, "I had a great time, thanks for asking me."  
  
Luka, "I had the feeling all night that you weren't comfortable with being with me. Is it because you know so much about me?"  
  
Chrissie, "No, I was just a little nervous with the situation. I think that I felt funny because we have been talking for months about you and you know nothing about me. I guess its only fair that I start telling you about myself, but it does feel strange. Don't you feel it?"  
  
Luka, "No, I feel completely comfortable with you now, I guess if we want to see each other socially we will work these things out. How do you feel about that? Would you like to go out again tomorrow night, maybe just dinner or a movie?"  
  
Chrissie, "You want to SEE me?"  
  
Luka, "I thought I made that clear when I asked you out last night, sorry, I guess I just took it for granted that you understood I did."  
  
Chrissie, "It just that you could have any woman you want, why me?"  
  
Luka (laughing), "You want a list of the reasons I want to see you?"  
  
Chrissie, "No, I guess not, I am just surprised. When you said you like talking to me, I thought, he wants a FRIEND and I can be that. I didn't think you were looking for a romantic thing."  
  
Luka, "Oh, now I feel funny!! I guess we could start off as friends, but I thought we were there already. I was hoping that you would consider something a little more serious. I think about you all the time Chrissie, actually I have been attracted to you from the first day I met you, but I was in real need of help and I didn't want my "Feeling" to interfere with you willingness to help me."  
  
Chrissie, "I had no idea, I'm sorry for miss reading it Luka. I have been attracted to you as well. Being your therapist I had to bury any ideas I had about you. I would love to have dinner tomorrow night. I promise I will try to relax."  
  
Luka, "Great, and Chrissie, if you want that list just let me know."  
  
Chrissie, "List?"  
  
Luka, "List of reasons I want to DATE you."  
  
That day Chrissie saw Kim in the unit and asked if she could talk to her.   
  
Chrissie, "Kim, he wants to date me!" Chrissie felt like a kid in study hall talking to a girlfriend. She couldn't stop smiling.  
  
Kim, "I know." Laughing at Chrissie.  
  
Chrissie, "What do you mean you know?"  
  
Kim, "Luka has mentioned it a few times when we were together. At dinner one night at our house he asked if you were available and then a few weeks later he mentioned that you were cutting him loose and that he was going to "try to get the courage up" to ask you out. Kerry and I couldn't stop laughing at him. He got a little upset. We laughed because here is this great looking, smart guy who has to get the courage up as he put it to ask someone out. We were like, "Luka, you are an adult, you are great looking, smart and very successful, what is the problem?" He said that he wasn't sure you were interested and he didn't want to ruin your friendship."  
  
Chrissie, "We went out last night, but I didn't know it was a "Date". Today, we talked about it and I think cleared everything up. He wants to date me!"  
  
Kim, "I hope you don't mind if I give you some advise. Just go slow Chris. Let Luka know that is what you want, he is such a great guy he will respect your wishes I am sure. Don't rush into anything you might regret later. Well, its not like I have to worry about you two. Shy people are so painful! It took you guys long enough to finally get this attraction off the ground. You are a perfect couple."  
  
Chrissie, "Yeah, I know, its just that for months I have been working with him thinking god, how I would love to do more, and now I am dating him and I don't even know were to begin."  
  
Kim, "Let him drive that train!! Slow Chrissie!!"  
  
They were perfect together. They liked the same things, and had terrific times together. Luka promised Chrissie that he would be a complete gentleman and never push her. They went on three dates before he even kissed her.   
  
After about a month, while they were out to dinner, Chrissie got up the nerve to ask Luka the important question.  
  
Chrissie, "So how do you feel about sex?" She asks turning completely red.  
  
Luka (choking on his drink), "I like it"  
  
Chrissie, "Very funny, you know what I mean, we have gone out every night that we could for the last month. So now I am wondering if you are interested?"  
  
Luka, "I thought for sure you could tell that. When we are kissing, I try not to get to close, so you can't feel it. I didn't want you to think I was pressuring you. If you are ready to discuss this, maybe we should do it someplace a little more private."  
  
That night as he dropped Chrissie off at her apartment she asked him in for coffee. They sat on the couch; she didn't go into the kitchen to make the coffee. Luka said, that he wanted her to know that making love was a big commitment to him and that if they did she should be prepared for there relationship to change some. She completely agreed. Then he said he wanted their first time to be special, so he was going to wait a few more days and plan a very special evening for them.  
  
Luka made sure that the next weekend was very special. He booked room at a place called Hart's Bed & Breakfast on Mackinac Island. They drove to Michigan and took a ferry to the island. It was the most romantic weekend Chrissie had ever had. They spent three days in their room. They didn't see any of sites on the island, it was perfect.  
  
Luka and Chrissie dated for 6 months when he finally asked her to marry him. She wasn't too shocked because he had been hinting for 5 months. Ever since they went to Mackinac Island. He told her he loved her a few weeks later and that he wanted to "Get Serious". Of course she said YES!!!! The wedding took place 3 months later with all their County friends in attendance. Kerry and Kim were their "Best Woman and Maid of Honor." Chrissie's family flew in from California.   
  
At the wedding as they danced to "Their Song", Luka looked at his new wife. He smiled and said, "I would have gone into therapy years earlier if I had known it would lead me to such a wonderful woman." Chrissie just smiled back as she kissed him.  
  
  



End file.
